(As given in the program to Quadrangle Town)
Jack Denice, Captain of the Crew of the eight-oared shell, is in love with Blazette. He slips away from training quarters to go down to the Senior Prom, the night before the big race. He meets Blazette and extracts a promise that, if Washington wins the race, she will be his. Teddy Darlington, Sub on the Crew, is in love with Dolly Denice, Jack's sister. He extracts a similar promise. Carlos Jose, the villain, is betting heavily against Washington and hatches a plot to kidnap Denice at the Prom. In the meantime, Professor Roberts of the faculty steals Carline from Willy and Billy Rah Rah and, in revenge, they lock him in the telephone booth with two antiquated post-grads, Miss Priscilla Filberts and Miss Ann Arbor. The first act closes when Jose, with the help of the Major and Minor Vilyuns, has succeeded in kidnapping Jack Denice.
The second act is the day of the big race. The disappearance of Jack is discovered and Teddy Darlington is told to take his place. But Teddy says that is impossible: he has flunked an Economics exam under Roberts that morning. However, Chip Ellison, disguised as a maiden fair from far-away Paree, has completely won the Professor, and he allows Teddy to take part in the race, discovering the deception only when it is too late. Teddy wins the race and Jack escapes from his captors just in time to see the finish. He wins Blazette. Teddy also wins Dolly, and all ends scrumptiously.